1980
Director: Mike Hodges
I am not joking.
Flash Gordon is not only a cinematic masterpiece, it is one of the most pro-American foreign movies I have ever seen. Seriously.
This film is not "so-bad-it's-good" - it is unabashedly good. It accomplishes all it sets out to do, and more. It is a big-screen comic-come-to-life, a theatrical space opera that provides close to two hours of solid entertainment. And it has music by Queen!
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| And freaking Max von "I was in The Seventh Seal" Sydow as the villain. Oh, along with Las Vegas Doctor Doom on the right there. |
But what makes it so patriotically American in addition to so awesome, you ask? Well, the answer is the character of Flash Gordon himself.
Now, as acted by Sam Jones (who is coincidentally the only American actor in the main cast), Flash is not that great of a character on the surface... a blond football quarterback who's wooden and not the sharpest knife in the drawer (although he does have his moments of cleverness - see the tree ritual scene), he is the sort of character that most viewers would assume is a foreign film's spoof of the All-American Boy.
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| "Durrr..." Actually, Dale is kind of blank, too. |
He doesn't defeat Ming the Merciless in a sword battle, doesn't personally lead an army in a climatic battle or come up with a scientific solution to save the Earth - in fact, in the end the Earth is saved randomly and for almost no reason at all ("You have saved your Earth. Have a nice day.")... so what makes Flash Gordon a great character and a great American hero?
Simple. Morals.
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| Okay, he *does* sort of impale Ming with a rocket ship too.... |
Flash Gordon and his friends Dale Arden and Dr. Zarkov come to Mongo to save the Earth and find that the planet is completely degenerate morally. There is a brutal fascistic dictatorship run by a madman - the reason that no one overthrows Ming is that they are too busy squabbling and fighting amongst themselves... a policy that Ming actively encourages in his subjects. If all of the racial groups of Mongo would just somehow unite, they could overthrow the Emperor. However, they are as morally degenerate as Ming himself, and lack any real human virtues - indeed, Ming tells his daughter Aura that tears are a "sign of weakness." There is no real feeling or joy on Mongo, only decadence and violence.
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| And this. Yes, this is the type of movie that this is. |
But the arrival of Flash (aaaaa-AHHHHHH!) changes that. He is the first to stand up to Ming and show that he can be defied, if only for a few minutes at least (he is quickly subdued and executed although he does get better). His defiance is a breath of fresh air, and inspires the people of Mongo to set aside their differences, defy the emperor Ming and rule the planet with truth and justice and the American way. But they have to get morals first. And Flash Gordon is the moral enabler.
It's fascinating that the three people that Flash influence are princes (and a princess - cannot forget the princess).
Princess Aura revives Flash after his execution because of her lust for him and is later punished for it, being brutally tortured at the hands of her father's lackeys (and with the approval of daddy himself!). This makes Aura realize what others have suffered at the hands of her father and gives her a new-found feeling of empathy. She has to learn this before she becomes queen at the end of the movie.
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| This also has the side effect of giving the S&M minded in the audience a major boner. |
Prince Barin is jealous and cold towards any that not of his race. He is taught true compassion when Flash spares him after their fight in the Hawkmen's city. Barin has to learn that true compassion is not felt just towards your friends but your enemies. This makes it possible for him to become the rightful ruler at the end.
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| This *also* has the side effect of giving the S&M... wait, come to think of it this movie definitely has a very kinky vibe to it. |
Prince Vultan for all his blustering and shouting is actually a coward. He hates Ming but is too frightened to rise against him. Flash's tenacity ("Gordon's ALIVE?") and courage spur Vultan into finally taking the plunge ("diiiiiiive!") and uniting with Flash and the others to overthrow the tyrant of Mongo. He is rewarded at the end by being named General of the Armies.
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| "DIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIVE!" |
Flash is an unwavering moral force (Ming outright tells him that he has never seen his like before... right before offering to rule together with Flash. Flash naturally refuses). His effect on the moral characters of others is what really drives the film thematically - their redemption and the ultimate redemption of their world is what Flash Gordon is really all about. See, the song during the titles isn't just hyperbole: Flash IS the savior of the universe, he IS a miracle, he IS king of the impossible and he WILL save every one of us. Queen laid it all out right at the start of the movie. Wasn't that nice of them?
So to sum up: A blond "All-American" football player, travels to a foreign place in the throes of a brutal fascist dictatorship and inspires the people through his moral leadership and defiance of the ruling regime to unite and rise up against that regime and in the process saves his own home. Sounds like American propaganda to me! Also sounds like the British and Italians deep down really, really like us.
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| Also, they like phallic rockets - GOD, this movie is really kinky, innit? |
Yes, I just overanalyzed Flash Gordon.
You're welcome.
Happy Fourth.
