Well, How Did I Get Here?

Before I get to my next movie review, a short notice.  Due to the fact that I work retail and the Christmas shopping season is here (Black Friday is next week!  Yay!) I may not get to work on this blog as much as I’d like.  I will still watch and review stuff, but at a slower pace (no more 9-posts-per-month stuff) and more irregularly (meaning no more updating every week on Saturday like clockwork).  With that being said, let’s get to this week’s movie and

Theatrical Film, 1984

Director: Jonathan Demme

The Story

All of the mental patients in a state asylum seem to be sharing the same dream.  They all dream that they are mythic warriors in a fantasy kingdom chosen to do battle with the forces of darkness.  However – when they sleep in that world, they all dream that they are patients in an insane asylum.  Are all of these people insane?  Does it have to do with the drugs that they’re given by the doctors?  Or are they being attacked mentally by the evil sorcerer K’rush, who –

Nah, I’m just messing with you.  This is a concert movie of the band Talking Heads.

And the people in this movie aren’t insane.  Just on a lot of drugs.

Review

Talking Heads are one of my favorite rock bands.  In fact, I’ve been a Talking Heads fan since I was two years old, when my favorite song was “Psycho Killer.”  So there you go.  That explains a lot about me, doesn’t it?  I have grown up with this movie, or more accurately with the soundtrack of this movie – my parents had it on LP.  I used to own the first CD edition of it but got the expanded version a while back.  In fact, if they released a Super-Duper-Deluxo-Collector’s Edition where the only addition was an audio outtake of David Byrne farting on stage I’d probably buy that too.  I didn’t get the chance to see the actual movie until a few years ago when I found it on VHS (it had been out-of-print for a while by then, so it was a major find for me).  When the DVD came out I had to get that too.

Why?  Simple.  Stop Making Sense is my favorite concert movie.  There’s no bullshit here.  No audience reaction shots (at least until the very end).  No interviews backstage.  No fan interviews.  No flashy camerawork.  No cutaway sequences.  Just music.  Glorious, glorious music.  And one crappy song.  But more on that later.

I’m not going to over-analyze this movie, oddly enough.  Other people have done that.  If you wonder why David Byrne wiggles around on the stage the way he does or why the stagehands all wear black or why all the bandmembers come out one at a time or whatever, just do some research on the internet.  Or you can listen to the audio commentary on the DVD, I believe some of these questions are answered there… I don’t know for sure though as I have never listened to the commentary all the way through – I always switched back to the music.

This is the greatest concert movie ever, with some of the greatest rock music ever.  In fact, I don’t even think you could call this rock, since there are so many genres of music blended into this magnum opus.  Frontman David Byrne is a genius.  That word is thrown around way too much, but here it’s true.  He’s crazy and on drugs (in this movie at least) but the man is a genius.  In fact, I got the chance to see him on tour last year and he is just as awesome today as he was when he fronting the Heads.  The only time I have ever danced in public was at that concert (and I made a complete fool of myself as I tend to dance like a spastic idiot.  Oh well, I still had fun!)  If you ever get a chance to see him live do not pass it up.  Part of what makes this movie work though is not only the genius of the band (and the man fronting it) but the genius of the director as well.  Jonathan Demme knows how to use a camera in a rock concert.  He doesn’t get flashy or show off… he simply shows you what’s on stage.  This shows remarkable restraint and the movie is so much better for it.

The one down moment in Stop Making Sense though is the one song done by the side project of band members Chris Frantz and Tina Weymouth, The Tom Tom Club.  “Genius of Love” sucks.  And not just because of the song itself (which I have never liked) – It’s because it completely messes up the flow of the whole movie.  Before you’re grooving along to the music of Talking Heads and the subdued staging and the flow of it all and then suddenly you’re confronted with the hideous, hideous embarrassing vocal stylings of goofball doofus Chris Frantz and the over-the-top use of STROBE LIGHTS which jolts you right out of the movie and into pissed-off land.  In fact, speaking of the strobe lights, here’s an announcement I am compelled to make in complete seriousness (this is not a joke):

WARNING:  If you have epilepsy or are prone to epilepsy DO NOT watch “Genius of Love.”  The strobe lights used in this sequence will probably induce seizures and cause possible death. 

I found it extremely uncomfortable and I am not prone to epilepsy whatsoever.  In fact, you should probably skip this song altogether as it brings the movie to a grinding halt.

…Which luckily picks up again the moment David Byrne comes onstage again in his infamous Big Suit to sing “Girlfriend is Better.”  And the concert stays awesome ‘till the end.  Yay!

If I haven’t yet made it clear, see this movie.  It is the greatest rock concert movie ever.  Just skip “Genius of Love.”  Now if you’ll excuse me, I have to go dance spastically to the soundtrack again.

Screenshots

Note:  Merely looking at these screenshots is not enough to gauge this movie as it is a concert film, after all.  To get the best experience, get a copy of the soundtrack album or find some sound clips of the album on the internet and listen while looking at these pics.  You can call it "Stop Making Sense, the Mini-Experience."

Our frontman, David Byrne, looking like something out of a horror movie.  Creepy!

 

Even creepier, though:  bassist Tina Weymouth.  I don't know whether she is stoned throughout the entire concert or whether she's just really focused, but Ms. Tina just looks intense and only cracks a smile twice in the entire movie.  This is odd as everyone else looks like they're really getting into it and having a lot of fun.

Only this movie could make dancing with a lamp look completely natural.

Just an artsy pretentious shot from an artsy pretentious rock movie.

....I want ...a Big Suit....

A cool moment:  during "Girlfriend is Better" Byrne briefly offers the mike to one of the crew...

...then to you, the viewer!  Isn't that awesome?

I guess David is a big Linux fan.

Next Week:  I don't know.  I don't know anymore.  My life is so full of uncertainty!  I can't handle it anymore!!  I think I'm going to – hey!  Thanksgiving is right around the corner!  Alright!  PIG OUT!!

(Consumes mass quantities.  Sleeps in turkey-induced coma for a week)

This Week: Enlightenment For The Masses (Yes, I Am A Giant, Pretentious Prick)

Instead of doing a movie review today, I thought I’d do something a little different.  My gloating in my last post about how I beat the Amazon Scalper Douchebags and got Dominion for 3 bucks got me to thinking how I should help others get the same kind of satisfaction that I did.  Why be an ass and keep the happiness to myself?  So today I present

7 Rules For Picking Up DVDs On The Cheap

-or, How To Get Movies Without Being Totally Screwed-

I have never believed in having to pay full price for a DVD.  Even back when I wasn’t dead broke I never liked paying retail for any disc, used or new.  Now that I do have almost no money, paying as little as possible is vital and goes a long way – especially with bills to pay.  Whatever your reason for wanting to save on movie watching (like you need a reason), here are some rules to follow to ensure that you aren’t screwed by the retailers (for new discs) or greedy second-hand sellers (used).



1.  Never Pay More Than $15 For A Single Disc

If the disc is used, lower that number down to 10.  If you’re broke like me, lower it down to 5.  If the disc is hideously rare and out-of-print and/or gives off the Light of God then raise the number to 20.  If you’re dealing with boxsets, divide the price by the number of discs to determine the price of each single disc.  This is a general rule I have always followed.  Anything more than 15 dollars for a new single DVD is too much, especially if it doesn’t have any special features.  In fact, if a DVD has no special features at all and it’s new then you probably shouldn’t be paying more than 10 bucks.  No normal used disc is worth more than 10 bucks – don’t ever pay any more than this.  A disc that is out of print and rare however, is a special case.  In this case you may have to pay up to 20 dollars, 25 at the absolute maximum but no more than that.  I don’t care how rare it is, no DVD is worth over 25 dollars.  There is an exception to this rule though, and that is if you really, *really* want it more than anything in the whole world, which brings us to the next rule, which is….


2.  Make Sure You Really Want What You’re Buying

If you have money and you can afford to buy any disc you want, you might be able to pass this rule by but I would still advise that you follow it.  Yes, picking something up in the bargain bin on a whim is fun and sometimes you can find a real gem, but sometimes you end up with utter crap too.  For someone with little money this rule is vital.  You don’t want to squander what little cash you have on something that is complete garbage.  And if you have a lot of money, you still want to save it – you never know when you're going to run out of cash and frugality is always a good thing.  So only pick up stuff you know you want.  If you think you may be interested in a movie you haven’t seen before, do a little research.  Look up the movie on Wikipedia or IMDB.  Read some online reviews.  Talk to your friends.  Just be wary though, because sometimes reviewers can hype something to death and it will still suck.  The best way to research a movie is to see if you can watch some clips from it – Youtube in particular is your best friend.


3.  Prepare To Buy Used

This one is especially for those with a tiny budget or who want something that is out-of-print.  Be prepared to not be able to get that nice, new shiny boxset that you covet.  You’ll probably have to get it used.  Video rental places like Blockbuster sometimes have used DVDs for sale, but be wary as they are former rentals – pick up discs only if they are rare or normally very expensive.  You can check your local Goodwill or thrift shop, but the discs found at these places are normally garbage, both in terms of movie quality and condition.  Sometime you can find a gem though, so don’t completely rule it out.  The best place for used DVDs though may be the used bookstore, if they carry movies – you can find some great deals, especially as some used bookstore owners price used DVDs really cheap since they don’t know that much about them – this is how I picked up my copy of Macross Plus for 3 dollars.  Be prepared to have your purchase a little banged up though – this is used stuff were talking about.  The aforementioned Macross Plus boxset was definitely not in new shape when I bought it, but it wasn’t completely BTS and it was THREE BUCKS.  And this brings me to my last point – don’t overpay for something that has had the snot beaten out of it, no matter how desperate you are.  If a boxset normally costs $50 and the used copy is 25 but looks like it’s been in the ring with Muhammed Ali for a few rounds, pass it by.  It’s at only half the retail but with four times the damage.  It’s too much.


4.  For New Discs, Use Discounts

If you can afford to buy new discs, you still shouldn’t pay full retail – it will save you money in the long run.  Besides, it’s good to know that you saved bigtime on that movie you wanted – makes you feel like you’ve BEATEN THE MAN!  But seriously, if you shop at any of the big retailers a lot – and I cannot believe I am about to say this, I feel like a corporate whore – pick up their discount cards. It will save you some money, especially if they offer coupons.  Be wary though, as sometimes they will play with you.  Borders, for example offers 30 and 40% off coupons to members but sometimes this only applies IN STORE.  This sucks because Borders doesn’t carry that many movies that are actually worth a crap in their store any more.  They started reducing their movie and music sections a while back, and now most of the good stuff is online.


5.  Watch For Sales 

Be vigilant.  Check places often because sometimes sales come and go very quickly.  This is how I got my copies of Dominion and New Dominion.  MovieStop had a 40% Off Used Anime sale for the month of October, and while I don’t like going to MovieStop – they’re owned by the same people who run GameStop, and I hate that store – I couldn’t pass on the opportunity.  Barnes & Noble semi-regularly has a Half-Off Criterion Collection Sale.  Do not pass on this.  This is the only time I will buy Criterion discs – they’re normally very, very expensive – and this is a great opportunity to pick up some great films, as Criterion releases some of the greatest films of all time from directors like Kurosawa and Hitchcock (they release some real garbage sometimes though – a note to Criterion: just because something is European does not make it art – or even “culturally relevant”).  The only reason I was able to get and enjoy Videodrome was because of the Criterion Sale.


6.  Have Patience!

You don’t have to have that ultra-rare copy of Captain Harlock Vs. The Evil Dead right NOW! NOW! NOW!!  If you wait for a little while a great deal can come to you.  Again, this is how I picked up Dominion.  I had wanted it for a while, but the Amazon Scalpers (argh!) wanted too much for it.  Back then they wanted 35 dollars, which is better than the 75 bucks later on but still too much for a single disc to me (See Rule #1).  Well, I waited and later picked it up for three dollars.  So just control your urge and resist picking up that movie you want – you may find it later on for a better price.  Good things come to those who wait.


7.  – But Not Too Much

Sometimes though it does pay to pick something up now – but only if you are 99% sure that the price of the disc you are holding in your hands is going to skyrocket to unbuyable prices soon.  Just be very careful.  You don’t want to overpay for something you might get later for less.   You also don't want to leave something rare that you want up on a shelf for too long or someone else might snatch it.  If you see something that’s in good shape for a reasonable price and you really, really want it then go ahead.  Yes, you might find it for dirt cheap later on and in better shape, but then again you may not.  And besides, you can always pick it up and have another copy to sell.  Or build a shrine to.  Or dress in your old clothes and pretend it’s a real person, a real friend that can spend time with you since no one else will *sob.*  Sorry.  Anyways, just be rational and balance things in your head and you will be just fine.

Well, there are my "7 Rules For Picking Up DVDs On The Cheap".  Hopefully they can make your wallet happier and keep you from getting screwed while looking for movies to watch.  These rules can actually apply to anything though, including music, books, musical instruments, anything.  And a lot of these are common sense, really.  But I thought I would share them anyway seeing as how sometimes we can forget common sense when pursuing our favorite hobby or activity.  I, for example completely lose all objectivity when engaging in my hobby of playing bass guitar and singing Wagnerian opera in the nude.

With that lovely thought now stuck in your head, thank you and good night.

Double Anime Deluxe With Extra Relish

This week on PFT – a double review!  TWICE the shows!  TWICE the pictures!  TWICE the bloated, over-analytical bullshit!  So join me for this first Super Review as I review the gruesome twosome of

OVA, 1988

Directors: Koichi Mashimo, Takaki Ishiyama

 -and-

OVA, 1993

Director: Noboru Furuse

The Story

Dominion – In the FUTURE Japanese metropolis of Newport City, the bacterial smog is deadly and the criminals are even deadlier.  So deadly, in fact, that the police need tanks in order to deal with them effectively.  New Tank Police recruit Leona Ozaki has not had a good first day:  on her first patrol she wrecked her squad leader Brenten’s custom tank and is doomed to be transferred to the Child Welfare department as punishment.  Out of the ashes of the former tank though a new, smaller one emerges… Leona builds a mini-tank from the wreck of her boss’s former mount and names it Bonaparte.  Can Leona prove herself and Bonaparte in action against the notorious and dangerous android criminal trio of Buaku and the Puma Sisters or will she be exiled to a desk forever?  And why is Buaku and his gang breaking into a hospital… for healthy people?!

New Dominion – Leona is still in the Tank Police (what, did you seriously think she would be transferred?) and still terrorizing the city as much as the criminals.  When her former partner from the Motorcycle division is killed however a new threat emerges in the form of the Dai Nippon Giken Corporation, who is developing a weapon that might spell doom for the Tank Police and the city…

The Review

“Gahh!”  I know you’re saying.  “More anime?  I can’t stand it!  Why do you watch so much Japanese animation all the time?!”  At least that’s what I know “you’re” saying in my delusional little mind, because I’m about 99% sure that only about three people read this blog, including myself (yes, I read my own blog.  It doesn’t mean I’m mad or anything… All work and no play….).  Anyways, there’s more anime this week for a few important reasons.  A) Anime is good for you, so stop complaining.  It’s got all of the good vitamins, minerals and fanservice that you need for a balanced diet.  B) Anime is more addictive than crack and C) I just bought and watched these OVAs for the first time.  Yes, I just bought these.  For cheap, too.  Anyone who knows about Dominion will know that this is incredible seeing as how both of these are out of print and currently very expensive online.  Right now the minimum used price on Amazon for these is at about $75 each.  I had wanted to see the original OVA as I had read and enjoyed the manga but didn’t want to pay some (censored) on Amazon three-quarters of a hundred bucks for it.  Well, I found this the other day while browsing at my local video store:

And it wasn’t even that much because they had a 40% off sale!  So, to sum up:  original retail price $25, Amazon used price $75, I paid $3.  Suck on that, Amazon scalper assholes!  New Dominion was only a little more expensive (with the sale I ended up getting it for 6 bucks), but still better than paying Amazon Douchebag Price.






Well, anyways, I took these home and watched them and really enjoyed them (well, I really, really liked the first one – I didn’t enjoy New Dominion as much, but still liked the fact that I was able to try it out without breaking the bank) so I thought I’d review them.



Dominion is a classic OVA, and one of the best from the 80s.  The animation is dated and the music is sort of bland (and really dated) but damn it, this thing is so much fun.  And it’s really funny to boot.  As in, riotously hilarious.  There are a ton of great gags in this anime and I had to resist the urge to include them in the screenshots section because that would completely ruin them for you when they come up while you watch this show (and you will watch it, right?).  However, being based on a Shirow Masamune comic, you’re going to get philosophy mixed in with the funny, and here Dominion delivers as well.  The opening of the first episode was one of the best debates on the use of force by the police that I have ever seen – and this is in a cartoon where the cops use tanks.  There’s no moral simplicity either – both sides are seen as having valid arguments, something I think is sorely missing when the media tackles subjects like these nowadays.  We also get hilarious and yet at the same time downright disturbing criminal interrogation scenes in this anime.  This is especially relevant today given the debate in the US over how to treat suspected terrorists and the like, with some being morally horrified at torture and some believing it’s the right way to conduct interrogations.  Personally I found the interrogation scenes in Dominion to be both uncomfortably upsetting and laughingly amusing at the same time, in addition to being completely over-the-top (like a lot of the stuff in this anime).  I never thought I would be laughing so hard as well as cringing at the sight of a criminal interrogation where the prisoner has a grenade stuffed in his mouth with the pin attached through a piece of string to an unstable bucket of water – with the cops taking turns trying to tip the bucket over via a game of mini-golf.  Congratulations, Dominion!  This being a Shirow-derived anime you’re also going to get ruminations on ecology and artificial intelligence – this time all in one!  Don’t worry though: this anime isn’t ultra-heavy or dense like Ghost in the Shell.  Speaking of which, next time you read that manga, keep an eye out for a cameo from the Puma Twins having a run in with a Fuchikoma.  It’s hilarious! 

New Dominion is not as good, simply because of the fact that it’s not as funny or distinctive.  It is probably a little closer in tone to (and includes more characters from) the manga  and is still funny in spots but overall it just felt… bland to me.  Also, it felt a little clichéd.  All of the standard Cop Show Tropes are here:  the murdered Former Partner, the Resignation, the Three-Minute Investigation…. About the only thing this Cop Show has that the others don’t is a pair of screaming cat girls strapped to the front of a tank.  Yes, really.  And on a personal note, if I see another Evil-Murdering-Weapons-Manufacturing-Corporation in another anime I’m going to scream.  I didn’t like it in the Patlabor TV Series, I was sick of it by Bubblegum Crisis and I was really tired of it here.  Note to anime directors: when I start comparing your show to Bubblegum Crisis you know you’re in trouble.  Look, I’m not Mr. Capitalist but honestly – how many of these can you have in anime?  Do the Japanese – who are probably the most-corporate minded people on Earth, slightly ahead of Americans – really think that arms manufacturers are going to go around industrialized populated cities testing out their latest weapons when they have the third world to do it in?  Also, the plot to kill the mayor (who is more sympathetic and rounded than the original’s by the way – something I enjoyed) in this show put it over the edge in believability for me (and this in a world where cops drive tanks through toxic smog).  Corporations do not plot to literally kill political figures in modern democracies; they use personal assassination instead – sex scandals, compromising photographs, etc.  And if they can’t dig something up they’ll just make something up or, just throw money at your enemies until you fall down and go splort in a pool of mud.  At least that’s the way it works in American politics, I don’t know about the politics of Future Japan.  Outright murder though would bring WAY too much attention to a corporation and result in HUGE cash losses and possible shutdown, so they wouldn’t take this option.  Not because it’s immoral but because it’s too risky.  In underdeveloped nations however….

One misconception that people have about Dominion going into it is that it is a standalone OVA.  They always complain at the ending because it “doesn’t have a proper ending.”  They think that more episodes must have been planned but were axed and that Dominion is an incomplete OVA.    Well, no.  In order to get the rest of the story, you have to read the manga, because that continues the storyline.  Or, more accurately, the Dominion OVA is a prequel to the manga, since the manga came out first.  New Dominion is a sequel of sorts, seeing as how Buaku is no longer around and the villains are different – some people are often confused on this as well.  And this is one of the things that I like about both Dominion OVAs, namely that instead of just doing the standard anime thing and straight up adapting the manga into an animated form they flesh out the manga and become a supplement to the comic.  We see in the OVA, for instance how Leona joined the Tank Police and “met” Bonaparte and the villains – the manga dives right into the action and shows Leona chasing Buaku in her mini-tank right off the bat.   Speaking of Buaku, the portrayal of the villains in both OVAs is a little different than the original manga.  Buaku is shown as much more competent in the graphic novel and usually gets the upper hand on the police instead of the other way around like in the anime.  Maybe he learned a thing or two and got smarter between the two.  Also, the android cat girl twins Anna and Uni Puma are far, far more dangerous and vicious in the manga then they are in the anime.  I mean, they do have some comic moments in the comic (hey!) and they’re still ditzy but overall they’re just nastier and even brutal.  The anime (especially New Dominion) makes them funnier and a little more sympathetic.  Maybe this is just a set up to the sequel manga Dominion Conflict: No More Noise, though, because there Shirow portrays the twins as... cute? and has them join the tank police (!) and get into all sort of comic mischief. 

Anyways, in conclusion:  see Dominion!  But you can probably give New Dominion a miss, it’s not as interesting.  And for Bonaparte’s sake, read the manga!  In addition to being really good it will continue the storyline you just saw in the anime and give you a real ending.  Then read the Dominion Conflict manga, which is less cerebral but more funny than the original.  It's a hoot! 

Screenshots 

Dominion

 Our heroine Leona Ozaki.  Any resemblance to another redheaded 

Japanese police officer with a mecha fetish is entirely coincidental.

What is wrong with this picture?

What is wrong with this picture?

The architecture of Newport City is very... fungal.

Dick Cheney would be proud.

Our villains.  Maybe they just saw House.

To the Brentenmobile!

It must be karaoke night down at the police station again.

Yes.  Yes.

"Buaku, you idiot!... this is the last time I let you give me racing tips!"

New Dominion

The buildings in New Dominion are less... mushroom-y.

Leona and Bonaparte on patrol.  Bad boys, whatcha gonna do when they come for you?

The Chief of the Tank Police.  This is pretty much his default expression.

Mayor Weatherbea.  Her pained expression is probably the result of the Tank Police.

 Al, Leona and the Puma Sisters take time out from playing 

cops and robbers to play a game of Twister instead.

Only in Japan.

"Why, yes, I AM an evil corporate executive.  How could you tell?"

 Miss Beechum the secretary.  I think it's creepy how she's supposed to have a crush on Al, 

considering she looks like she could be his sister and all.

What inevitably follows the Tank Police everywhere they go.

Puma Sister Hood Ornaments.  What, did you think I was lying?

Next Week: Another very special posting, because I love you.