So what is the subject of this review? Well, hold on to your hats because I'm actually tackling AMERICAN animation for once (why should the Japanese have all the fun?). And it's a television program. Made in the Seventies. And the title of this gem is... Star Trek. Yes, prepare yourself for some 70s Filmation Cheese (Hey, at least it's not as bad as Hanna Barbera - uh oh, there I go being negative, stop it, stop it....) and enjoy the ride through the Final Frontier as I give you
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| Kirk and Co. looking fabulous. |
Star Trek needs more miniskirt-centric episodes like this one (ahem).
Also, when did Nurse Chapel join Security?
Facts I Learned From Star Trek: The Animated Series,
#1: The Japanese did not invent animated tentacle rape.
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| I guess the ship's tailor is a Captain Picard fan. |
Facts I Learned From Star Trek: The Animated Series,
#2: The color of you eyes...
...is the exact same as the color of your skin.
Also, Kirk apparently snorts cocaine.
"Spock, I think we'll have to practice harder
if we want to win the interpretive dance competition."
The first clue that this is a Saturday Morning Kid's Program:
Kirk gets hit on by a woman and he doesn't immediately
"educate" her in "this thing you humans call kissing."
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| Spock, getting a free lapdance... |
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| ...and McCoy, getting his groove on. Cue Marvin Gaye! |
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| "They don't understand you. Only I understand you, my love." |
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| Alright, slashers. On your mark, get set.... |
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| Okay, before it was Kirk, now the whole bridge crew is trippin'. What gives? |
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| "What's that look, Jim? What are doing with that tribble, Jim? Where are you going to put that tribble, Captain?" |
Facts I Learned From Star Trek: The Animated Series,
#3: Captain Kirk laughs just like a Japanese schoolgirl.
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| For those of you with a Furry fetish, TAS DELIVERS! |
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| "Is Nurse Chapel gonna hafta choke a bitch?" |
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| "Since joining these men I have seen shit that will turn you white." |
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| Jimi Hendrix eat your heart out. |
Holy crap, now it's a strung-out alien!
What is with all the drug use on this show?
Well, there you go, that's Star Trek: The Animated Series. It's an okay show. It's not great, but it is an entertaining enough way to spend a half of an hour. It's certainly a better Star Trek show than Voyager or the cosmic shit-storm that is (ack) Enterprise.
There I go, being negative again...
Happy Place.
Happy Place.
Happy Place.
For Voyager, try fast-forwarding to where Seven-of-Nine joins the show. Addition of a slender, buxom blond is always a good thing. After you've fallen in love with her, consider the chronology that after hours of filming the show, the actress would go home and get beaten by her husband, if I got the chronology correct.
ReplyDeleteRegarding Enterprise, now that we're older and wiser, recommend trying it again. At first it's hard to recognize it as part of the Trek franchise. And the theme song is certainly a-typical and about 6 dB too loud, forcing you to play with the remote control to turn it down until the show starts again. But the characters are excellent (hi point is the doctor) and the productions quickly improve within just a few episodes (arguments with the Vulcans are tedious for the first couple of episodes, and then creativity sets in and the show takes off). By the end of the series, they do time-travel complications better than anyone.
Conversely, The Next Generation got anachronistic real fast. They should have renamed the end for the series "Family Values Trek." If there was Wesley or Woopie, it was good. If there was Warf's son, I'd rather watch Spongebob Squarepants.