All Godzilla Things Must Come To An End

It's the end of May, and that means the end of Godzilla MAYhem.  To tell you the truth I'm a little burned out after covering all of these Godzilla movies over the past few weeks... so today it's gonna be short and sweet, which is not that bad considering that the Seventies were probably the slightest time for the Godzilla franchise (although the Nineties might have been close but that's another story).  Without further ado,

Godzilla MAYhem

Part IV: The Seventies

This is the Superhero Phase.  No, seriously.  Godzilla morphs during the next five movies from a dangerous creature who reluctantly fights foes of humanity to a full-blown defender of mankind and the go-to guy for stopping ecological menaces and alien invasions.  Even the fighting has changed, being less bestial and more... kung fu.


Godzilla vs. Hedorah (1971)


This is probably the most dated Godzilla movie - actually, all of the movies of the seventies date themselves pretty badly... you can always tell exactly when these were made.  Anyway, the foe in this film is a giant monster made out of toxic sludge (this is an environmentalist film, can you tell?) and is the most disgusting enemy Godzilla has ever fought.

It's a giant, sludgy... eyegina.

This is a great movie, and everything a lover of cheesy monster movies could want.  The villainous Hedorah is genuinely creepy, the plot makes sense in a weird sort of way and it is one of the few Godzilla films after the original to depict the real, deadly consequences of having these giant monsters on the loose (it's actually a rather violent film).

This film is charming in its seventiesness:  it's really trippy, and almost artsy in a way - this is the only Godzilla movie that Yoshimitsu Banno (assistant director for The Hidden Fortress and Throne of Blood) ever directed, and it's a shame seeing as it has a lot of visual flair.

Cue Ennio Morricone.

Plus it has the "Save the Environment" theme, which Japan desperately needed in the 1970s.

...along with a backwards-flying Godzilla, apparently.

Al Gore would be proud.


Godzilla vs. Gigan (1972)

This is the worst Godzilla movie of the seventies and probably the worst ever made.  I don't like it so I'm not going to write that much about it.  The plot shows some promise early on but ends up being a standard alien invasion story with giant cockroaches controlling (what else) giant monsters in order to take over the world.

And it has hippies.

The biggest problem with Godzilla vs Gigan isn't that it's stupid, it's that it's dull.  Even the monster fight scenes are boring, and they're very poorly thought out.  One minute Godzilla is having his ass handed to him, the next minute he's making Gigan his bitch.

Brawwwwk!

This movie was the first to have a two-on-two monster match (Anguirus and King Ghidorah also appear), which would be repeated the next year in a movie that was equally as stupid but not as boring which brings us to


Godzilla vs. Megalon (1973)

This is a classic.  No, I'm dead serious.  Yes, it's bad, but it's a *fun* kind of bad.  Godzilla vs Megalon is unfairly maligned by Godzilla fans... c'mon at this point in the franchise, what do you expect, King Lear?

Pictured: Great Thespianism.

This movie is an entertaining romp, with an Ultraman-style robot superhero, a giant beetle god, a white dude with a 70s 'stache and a tiara, a car chase, groovy seventies music and enough stock footage to shake a stick at (this film and its predecessor are the worst offenders in this area).

Here's a game: see if you can identify the movies that all of the stock footage in this film comes from.  If you can you get a free cookie (actually no you don't).

But you do get *this*.  Okay, this is simultaneously the most
hilarious and awesome thing I have ever seen in a Godzilla movie.

Another point of trivia for Godzilla vs Megalon is that there are no women in it, making this the sole sausage-fest Godzilla movie.

Kinda suspicious if you ask me....

There would definitely be women in the next Godzilla movie though (miniskirts abound!) with


Godzilla vs. Mechagodzilla (1974)

The quality goes up but that's not saying much.  Mechagodzilla makes for a more credible foe than either Gigan or Megalon (even though Gigan looks kinda cool and was the first monster opponent to make Godzilla bleed).

Speaking of blood, Jun Fukuda must have been watching Sanjuro, because Godzilla gushes geysers during his fight with his robotic doppelganger.

Also, this movie technically has a 2 on 1 monster fight but Godzilla's ally, King Caesar is pretty useless so I don't count it as one.

Pictured: shattered expectations.

Still, there's a good time to be had.  The music by Masaru Sato is jazzy and fun, the monster battles are fun enough and the acting is pretty decent for this type of movie even though none of the characters are that great.

"Hold it, or the two stereotypes get it!"

Overall, I recommend it.


Terror of Mechagodzilla (1975)

Not only is this a direct sequel to the previous film, it's superior to it as well.  And it's no wonder, considering that the director for this final movie in the original series of Godzilla films is none other than Ishiro Honda.  Don't get me wrong, Jun Fukuda isn't a bad director, but outside of his sixties efforts none of his films come close to the artistry of Honda's (although this also has something to do with Toho slashing the budgets of the films as time went on).

I really love this film, although I admit it has some major flaws.  There are some huge plotholes - why did those aliens come out of nowhere to help Katsura when she had her initial accident and how did they know it would happen?

More importantly, why does Katsuita - ur, I mean, Katsura wear that outfit?

Why was Dr. Mafune discredited, nay, savagely beaten by his fellow scientists for suggesting that a dinosaur could still be alive when Godzilla, Rodan and the like had been tromping around on the Earth at that point?

Brings new meaning to the term "nerd rage", doesn't it?

Oh, well.  Even if there are major plotholes and the story is pretty standard (this is pretty good Honda but not Honda at the top of his game) except for the pathos from the female lead, what this movie lacks in substance it more than makes up for in style.

Pictured: style.

Godzilla looks better than he has in a long time.  Mechagodzilla looks as menacing as ever.

Fear the deadly RAINBOW BEAMS!

Titanosaurus (did I mention that this is another 2 vs. 1 fight, but slanted *against* Godzilla?) looks great.  For the first time in a long time the monsters actually look like they have size and mass.

The fight scenes are awesome.  Overall this is a great way to end a franchise...


...at least until 1984, when Godzilla would return as a bad guy again in the re-booted Return of Godzilla.

But that is a story for another time.  Wow, I ended writing more than I said I was going to.  I guess when we're talking about Godzilla, "short" and "sweet" don't apply, even in the nineteen hundred and seventies.
Well, I hope you've enjoyed Godzilla MAYhem... maybe this will inspire a few people to go watch some good old Godzilla movies.  The Big G definitely needs more love nowadays... I remember loving his movies when I was a kid (still do) but I haven't met any children today that have watched these and know how to appreciate them.  It's depressing in a way... there's almost no sense of wonder of real fun in entertainment aimed at young people.  Well, maybe if all the dedicated kaijuphiles work together we can turn the kiddies onto Godzilla again... or maybe the American Godzilla movie slated for 2014 can help, but I doubt it.



Sayonara.